STEFFAN ANWAR WYNN

[STEFFAN ANWAR WYNN]

STEFFAN ANWAR WYNN
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welcome to the world of tomorrow
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BURY ALL YOUR SECRETS IN MY SKIN
come away with innocence and leave me with my sins
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WE ALL HAVE STRENGTHS.
Before I lost my arm the first time around, I had some pretty good upper body strength. Having a robotic replacement helps that because I only have to worry about increasing the ability in only one of my arms. These robotic body parts actually come in handy in more ways than one. My right eye is one of them and I like to think I got a nicer model than usual. It doesn't have a problem with seeing in the dark but it doesn't actually have night vision. Night vision would make it easier to see in the dark but I’m doing just fine with what I’ve got now. My advice would be to stay away from me in the dark. Getting away from the combat and the threats, I am actually a pretty decent cook. I can take whatever I can get my hands on and make it somewhat edible. It’s a handy talent to have when I’ve got to keep moving from place to place.

WE ALL HAVE OUR WEAKNESSES.
If I cut or pull or disconnect this conveniently painted, thick, green wire in my left arm the entire thing becomes useless. It took a lot of time to purposely give myself that weakness but I want this arm replaced. Still, I'm sure it would be difficult to go about business with a lifeless arm hanging at my side. Probably even more difficult than that time I had to do it without an arm. I would have to say that still having regular human parts would also count as being a weakness but there really isn't anything I can do about that. I'm not going to start hacking away at myself so that I can add more and more robotic parts to my body. I don't have the money for that. I'll just let them naturally get damaged when I fight which seems like it has become another problem. I've been having trouble distinguishing between hostiles and the people that aren't. I get the feeling that could turn into a bigger problem if I don't do something about it. Its an ego problem and I think it could kill me. I kind of want to see that happen since it hasn't happened yet. I guess mentioning one little personal problem couldn't hurt. I'm not very good at using guns. I like fighting with my hands and legs but put a gun in there and I may very well shoot myself in the foot.

ADMIT IT OR NOT, WE'VE ALL BEEN AFRAID.
As much as it seems that I’m trying to get myself killed, I’m actually afraid of death. Why else would I have replacement parts put on and in my body? They’ll keep me alive longer than I probably should be. It’s all worth it, though. I’m honestly considering replacing just about everything that’s a part of me with cyborg parts and that should keep me alive. Unfortunately, the parts cost so much money it’s a surprise I have any of these parts at all. I also fear not only losing someone close to me but getting close to anyone at all. After all this time, everyone that I seem to know has ended up dead because of me. I don’t know if I’m unlucky or if I just attract death. I have no real family left because of it. No wife. No daughters. No anything. It’s really why I do what I do. I don’t have to connect with anyone and I don’t have to worry about them being killed.

AND WE HAVE OUR HABITS, GOOD & BAD.
I spend a lot of time looking at, touching, repairing, or inspecting my various cyborg additions. Except for the ones on the inside of my body, of course. If I could look at them or touch them, I probably would. But I can't. I mess with the wiring on my arm quite often considering it isn't covered up above my elbow. The wiring gets loose and i need to keep it in place. It's kind of like when I pick at my teeth. I always have toothpicks in my pocket for picking at my teeth. It isn't easy or possible to explain why, I just do it because it feels good. Even in the middle of a fight I'll pull one of those little wooden sticks out. It's better to have those in my mouth than a cigarette or something. I do like whistling a lot, too. I whistle when I fight to give myself some theme music like in those old movies I used to watch. Or I'll hum if I can't get it to sound right in whistles. It feels special to fight to the sound of music in my ears.

THEN THERE ARE THE THINGS THAT BUG US.
My arm acts up occasionally. Sometimes it will swing around or jerk forward or just about any strange movement you can think of. It really gets in the way when I'm trying to "work." I can't focus on trying to hit a guy when my arm is trying to hit me. I need a new one. A fourth one, actually. The first two were nice and got broken. This one is dysfunctional and no one will even try to touch the damn thing. I don't know if it's the arm or the fact that no one will touch it that bothers me but it bothers me. Something else that bothers me? Smoking and the people who do it. It might not be as unhealthy as anything else out there these days but it's still damn bad for you. Plus there's that smell. It makes me nauseous. I don't like feeling nauseous. Another one isn't all that common but I'm not too fond of people asking if I have a family I should be worrying about or what my children might think if they could see what it is I do.

AND, HEY, WE CAN ALL DREAM.
When you say dreams, I think sleeping. My dreams let me have my daughter back. I would like that much more than fulfilling some silly life goal. And in this world, it's not like you have anything but dreams to look forward to. They're a nice distraction from what it is I have to deal with when I'm awake. If I could call anything a dream or say I'm aspiring for anything, it's that I want to show the Perfect Nation and anyone connected to it that I'm stronger than they are. I wouldn't call it harsh if I said I wanted to kill all of them. It sounds reasonable. In fact, it sounds like one of those "life goals" I talked about before.

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SO IF YOU LOVE ME LET ME GO
and run away before i know
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I’ve lost a lot more than just a left arm, a right eye, a couple of fingers on my right hand, my liver, and my left ear. Those are all just physical injuries that have come from what I’ve basically dedicated my life to doing. I’m not a fan of the Perfect Nation or Peony or any of that. It’s all corruption and lies. I wanted to get away from it. Apparently they had a different idea. Now I’ve lost my wife and my daughter. They might be dead. They might be alive. I don’t know what happened to them. I woke up one morning and they were gone and I won’t hold onto any hope that they’re still out there. Life has been easier just trying to accept that they’re gone and it’s been difficult, if I can be honest.

I’ve used that to change everything I do with my life. Fighting and pillaging were not part of my life when I had a family to worry about. Now that there isn’t one to worry about I’ve made those two activities part of my life. It isn’t revenge. I wouldn’t call it anything close to revenge. I’m just a violent person because of it. A new outlook on life is what I could call it. I need to find money to keep myself supported and I need to find it anyway I can. There isn’t a job. There isn’t government support. I’m trying to find it any way I can. I’ve attacked people for their money. I lost my eye to being gouged out and I got it replaced. My arm was crushed the first time and I got it replaced. It was ripped off my body the second time. Last time, it just sort of died on me and I had to get an entirely new one. This one is the worst I’ve had yet. My fingers were cut off one time when I was captured. They’ve been replaced too. My liver wasn’t replaced because of damage from alcohol or anything. I was shot in the abdomen and one of the bullets had passed right through it. That was before I was on my own. My ear was a self-inflicted injury. I thought that I would have improved hearing but there wasn’t much of a difference.

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MY HEART IS JUST TOO DARK TO CARE
i can't destroy what isn't there
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i am steffan anwar wynn. in this world i am called a war dog and i take war dogs side in this war. the blood running through my veins and marks on my finger tips will bring you a file to tell you that i am a cyborg. and on that you will plainly see that i am male. those who see me often say i look a bit like tobias sorensen. but the dysfunctional arm and toothpick makes me one of a kind.

[HAY MONSTER!]

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